Waiting Outside the Lines
by Omegathyst
Summary: One year after running away from the forest, Blaze returns as a ThunderClan warrior named Blazespirit. After experiencing heartbreak from the Crimson Heroine and being abused by rogues, Blazespirit is convinced that StarClan is against her. Little does she know happiness is much closer than she thinks. We Could Be Series Spin-Off #1
1. Where She Tells Her Story

**"You have escaped the cage. Your wings are stretched out. Now fly."**  
 ** _-RUMI_**

 **ThunderClan**

 **Leader: Waspstar-black she-cat with amber eyes**  
 **Deputy: Hawkspiral-light brown she-cat with white swirls and amber eyes**  
 **Medicine Cats: Yellowlight-sleek orange she-cat**

 **Warriors**  
 **Onesplash-dark brown tabby she-cat**  
 **Leaffoot-brown tom with green eyes**  
 **Curlfoot-dark gray tom with blue eyes**  
 **Quickmouse-black and white she-cat**  
 **Woollyflight-fluffy orange and white tom**  
 **Hazelspeck-brown and white she-cat with amber eyes**  
 **Whitemask-black and orange tom with white face and chest**  
 **Mistbird-gray she-cat with black specks**  
 **Hailflower-gray tom with black stripes and green eyes**  
 **Scorchspots-dark orange tom with yellow splotches**  
 **Mintleaf-white and black she-cat with amber eyes**  
 **Marina-big white she-cat with green eyes**  
 **Nick-sleek orange tom with black paws**  
 **Harry-frizzy dark brown tom with amber eyes**  
 **Adrien-black tom with cream tuft between his ears**  
 **Marinette-gray blue she-cat with blue eyes**  
 **Larchberry-gray tom with green eyes**  
 **Dawnsplash-orange she-cat with white spots**  
 **Fernpelt-black and white tom**  
 **Ferretleap-cream tom with green eyes**  
 **Hogtussle-dark grey tabby she-cat with green eyes**  
 **Blazespirit-sleek light orange she-cat with amber eyes and nicked ear**  
 **Lilypool-tortoiseshell she-cat with green eyes**  
 **Poppystem-black she-cat with white tail**  
 **Lynxmask-fluffy gray she-cat with black stripes**  
 **Newtspots-white tom with brown markings**

 **Queens**  
 **Echoleap-light gray she-cat with black stripes(mother of Nick's kits: Flamekit, light orange tom and Ashkit, gray she-kit. 5 moons old)**  
 **Snowfeather-fluffy white she-cat(mother of Larchberry's kits: Mousekit, light gray tom, Mosskit, gray she-kit with white paws, and Morningkit, an orange she-kit. 2 moons old)**  
 **Amy-gray blue she-cat with blue eyes(mother of Newtspot's kits: Lichenkit, gray tom with black stripes, and Frogkit, black and white tom. 1 moon old)**

 **Elders**  
 **Dewdust-blue gray tom with blue eyes**

 **RiverClan**

 **Leader: Stonestar-light gray tom with blue eyes**  
 **Deputy: Owlmask-white she-cat with yellow eyes**  
 **Medicine Cat: Rowanpelt-orange tom with green eyes**

 **Warriors**  
 **Applefrost-stout orange she-cat**  
 **Sedgestep-orange tom with brown paws**  
 **Snailstep-dark brown tom with no tail and one ear**  
 **Willowtail-furry gray she-cat with green eyes**  
 **Honeybreeze-yellow she-cat with orange stripes**  
 **Brownpelt-dark brown tom with blue eyes**  
 **Flyfur-white tom with tabby patches**  
 **Voletooth-slim brown she-cat**  
 **Songpool-beautiful white she-cat with amber eyes**  
 **Spidermoon-black she-cat with amber eyes**  
 **Misha-small black she-cat with amber eyes**  
 **Apprentice, Dovepaw(white she-cat with pale yellow eyes)**  
 **Birddapple-dark brown she-cat with black patches**  
 **Toadsnarl-tabby tom with black specks and green eyes**  
 **Spottedpelt-orange and white she-cat with green eyes**  
 **Rainsky-light gray tom with darker gray patches**  
 **Apprentice, Toadpaw(almost black tom with amber eyes)**  
 **Marshcloud-gray she-cat with brown paws**  
 **Oakbranch-dark brown tom with**  
 **Lionbelly-orange tom with white paws**  
 **Thrushfrost-dark gray and white tom**  
 **Beesting-orange tom with black stripes**  
 **Irisgaze-tabby she-cat with violet eyes**  
 **Nightbreeze-black tom with brown paws**  
 **Apprentice, Duckpaw(brown and white tom)**  
 **Berryshine-white she-cat with pink ears**  
 **Thornspring-dark brown she-cat with white star on forehead**  
 **Pidgeonwing-gray and white tom**  
 **Softheart-cream colored tom with green eyes**  
 **Otternose-orange she-cat with white muzzle and paws**  
 **Sunnywing-dark grey tom with light gray stripes**  
 **Brackenfrost-fluffy dark brown tom**  
 **Zenithleap-tortoiseshell she-cat with mostly black fur**  
 **Snakegaze-black she-cat with amber eyes**

 **Queens**  
 **Redblossom-pudgy red-orange she-cat with green eyes(mother of Flyfur's kits: Amberkit, bright orange she-kit with green eyes, Ivykit, white she-kit with grey markings, Hollykit, light orange she-kit with amber eyes, and Moonkit, dark grey she-kit with orange eyes. 3 moons old)**  
 **Ivyheart-brown tabby she-cat(mother of Stonestar's kits: Cedarkit, dark grey tom with white paws, and Applekit, light brown she-kit. 1 moon old)**  
 **Petalstep-mostly black tortie she-cat(expecting Rainsky's kits in 2 moons)**

 **Elders**  
 **Bumblestream-gray tom with jet black stripes**  
 **Pebblebird-light gray she-cat with white tail**  
 **Nettleburr-long furred gray she-cat with blue eyes**  
 **Mothleap-white she-cat with green eyes**  
 **Heroneyes-gray tom with blue eyes**

 **ShadowClan**

 **Leader: Shallowstar-long furred black tom with amber eyes**  
 **Deputy: Finchfrost-white tom with brown splotches**  
 **Medicine Cat: Daisystorm-black she-cat with white chest and paws**

 **Warriors**  
 **Breezespirit-sleek black she-cat with blue eyes**  
 **Emberstem-black she-cat with orange eyes**  
 **Jioveheart-orange she-cat with gray paws and blue eyes**  
 **Jayflight-orange tom with amber eyes**  
 **Dovebeak-orange she-cat with green eyes**

 **WindClan**

 **Leader: Icestar-slim white she-cat with green eyes**  
 **Deputy: Fortune-black and white tom**  
 **Medicine Cats: Wolfhowl-gray and white she-cat with orange eyes**

 **Warriors**  
 **Stormclaw-muscular gray tom with amber eyes**  
 **Sagefur-white tom with black and orange markings**  
 **Blossomheart-tortoiseshell she-cat with amber eyes**

 **Cats Outside the Clans**  
 **Cora-tall bright orange she-cat with white 'star' on forehead**

* * *

 **Three moons ago, Blaze's POV**

I ran away from the place I was held captive for seven moons with tears flying from my eyes. After I left the Clans, I had found a group of kind and peaceful cats that I joined and stayed with for two moons before a group of vicious rogues killed all of them but me.

I would've been killed if their leader Cora hadn't noticed me. One of her rogues was going to kill me when she stopped him and told me about how pretty I was. She told me that I was coming with her, and how could I fight her? I was barely alive.

I was still recovering from the horrific attack when Cora announced that I was going to be her mate. The rogues considered it to be an honor that I was going to be her trophy mate and they were jealous of me. I didn't want it at all and Cora knew it. But it was either that or face death.

She had mated with me and I sobbed again to myself looking back on it. My parents told me that the first time you mate with another cat is supposed to be special. But it was anything _but_ special. My moons spent fearing her were a _living hell._

Whenever I didn't obey her I remembered that she slapped me, sometimes claws unsheathed. She did it so many times that I thought I deserved it at times. I was so happy to feel her kind touch when she wasn't infuriated with me that I thought I was losing it. I thought that this was my life and I was okay with it until Cora's rogues brought a black and brown kittypet that was very obedient that Cora liked more.

When she sent me away angrily, it was in that moment that I returned to my senses. That I was held captive. That I was in a abusive relationship. **_That I let her_ _force herself on_ _me, over_ _and_ _over again._**

But it still hurt that she chose that kittypet and kicked me out of the group of rogues. I was her mate and I was _replaced._ I should hate her, but the weak part of me missed her toxic touch.

I kept running and it wasn't until I stopped running that I realized that I was running in the direction that I came from. And in the distance was the huge lake that surrounded the Clans. I looked at the territory that I ran away from for nine moons and then looked back in the direction of the rogues that I ran away from. My heart belonged to the Clans. But which one?

RiverClan would never be my home and that was one thing I was certain about. ShadowClan hated RiverClan and would probably figure out that I used to be a RiverClan cat. Oakbranch's sister might be in WindClan now and she was a pretty nasty cat. Which leaves me with ThunderClan.

I took several steps forward before I broke into a sprint. I never thought that I'd return to the Clans, let alone be excited about it. But I was actually doing it!

The sunset was visible by the time I made it to the Moonpool that I escaped from so long ago. I saw a thorn barrier at the bottom of a small cliff in the distance. Was that ThunderClan camp?

I walked closer and closer till I felt something knock me over and suddenly forest green eyes looked at me with glee.

" _Hi!"_ The grey she-cat squealed. "Did you come here to join ThunderClan?"

"Um, yes actually." I admitted. This cat's whole expression of bubbly happiness was almost intoxicating but I kept my composure.

"Fantastic! I'll bring you into the camp! My name is Hogtussle."

Of course! This was one of Oakbranch's best friends! How could I forget? Hogtussle bounced towards the thorn barrier and crawled in a hole in the barrier. I crawled in as well as many unfamiliar cats glanced at me before returning to their conversations.

Me and Hogtussle kept moving forward till we entered a den where one black she-cat with bright amber eyes stood. Several mouse-lengths away from her was a grey cat with stripes sleeping comfortably.

"Hey Mom!" Hogtussle purred. "I brought a new friend!"

The ThunderClan leader was her mother? I looked up at the cat's unwavering gaze. Wasn't she Tawnystar's deputy Waspwing?

"I used to be Blazeflower until me and Redblossom separated." I explained, thinking about the Crimson Heroine for the first time in moons. "I haven't been part of RiverClan for seasons and I'm not-"

"Say no more." Waspstar put her paw over my mouth. "I believe you. You look like a pack of dogs chased you here. Who am I to turn you away?"

I felt slightly embarassed at her comment but I pushed it aside.

"Do you still wanna be Blazeflower?" Waspstar asked.

"No." I replied. "I wanna be..."

"Ooh! I got one! How about Blazespirit? You must've gone through a lot, but your spirit is still bright and strong. Like a fire!" Hogtussle suggested.

'Must've gone through a lot' was an understatement. But that _was_ a great suggestion. I nodded and Waspstar nuzzled her daughter before leaving her den.

"All cats that can catch their own prey come forward!" Waspstar yowled.

The grey cat that was previously asleep in Waspstar's den sprung to life and ran to his leader's side with a silly look in his eyes.

"Settle down Hailflower." Waspstar purred before looking at the Clan in silence till me and Hogtussle joined the rest of our Clanmates. "Blaze, do you promise to be a loyal ThunderClan warrior till you can no longer hunt or fight and that your loyalty will never bend to _any other_ Clan?"

"I...I do."

"Then you are now Blazespirit and you are welcomed as a full warrior of ThunderClan."

 _"Blazespirit! Blazespirit! Blazespirit!"_

The Clan dispersed and Waspstar approached me.

"You should remember Clan life pretty well. But if you don't, you can ask my daughter here." Waspstar explained, flicking her tail towards Hogtussle before heading back to her den with Hailflower. Hogtussle eagerly jumped to my side and laid her tail on my back.

"Soooooo, unless you wanna try out hunting patrols right now I was thinking about introducing you to the warriors in this Clan. That cool Blazie?" Hogtussle asked.

"Sure." I replied. Hogtussle gave a satisfied skip in her step as she lead me to the warrior's den where a few warriors were chilling.

"Because of a devastating attack seasons ago from RiverClan _and_ a pretty bad attack from ShadowClan only three moons ago, ThunderClan is choosing not to be picky about what new cats join." Hogtussle explained. "So we have a lot of former kittypets and rogues here. I have a brother and a sister and she's in the Nursery right now! Would you like to come with me to visit her?"

"Sure." I said, _again._ Hogtussle looked at me in the eyes like she was trying to find out my life story just from my eyes...before she turned away and walked to the Nursery. I followed her where there was a vicious grey she-cat, a bitter gray blue she-cat, and a happy white she-cat. I silently hoped Hogtussle's sister was the last one.

"Hogtussle! It's great to see you!" The white she-cat purred. "Who's this?"

"Clearly Newtspots's replacement." The gray blue she-cat growled.

"That makes no sense Amy. I broke up with _him."_ Hogtussle rolled her eyes. Wait, what?

"If anything, he's replacing Hogtussle with _you."_ The other grey she-cat sneered. Amy looked livid.

 _"He is not!"_ Amy snapped angrily. Hogtussle gave a shake of her fur before turning to me with her beautiful smile faltering.

"And...um...clearly there's _history_ in this Clan." Hogtussle laughed nervously. "I, uh, used to be mates with Newtspots. And uh...Lynxmask. And that seems to be it-"

"Don't forget Marinette's sister Alya before she left back to Twolegplace!" I heard a warrior shout from outside the Nursery.

She's not straight? Hogtussle glared at the warrior outside the Nursery.

"New cat? I'll have you know that Hog here is kind of a... _tramp."_ Amy smirked at Hogtussle's shocked expression.

"I'm not!" Hogtussle's eyes watered and I glared at Amy till I heard Hogtussle run away and I followed her until I found her laying down outside of the camp with her paws over her head.

"I...I guess her insulting me isn't that horrible. At least Waspstar gives her more moons to clean the elder's den when her kits become apprentices whenever she hears of her bullying me." I could tell that she was trying really hard to be positive and I sat down beside her.

"I'm here to listen." I whispered. For some reason not thinking about my own problems and listening to her's made me feel happier. Almost like I was starting a new leaf.

"What? Every cat I've been with hated listening." Hogtussle laughed bitterly. "You mean it?"

"Y-yeah." I replied slightly thrown off by the previous comment she said. "I'm free to just sit here and listen."

Hogtussle leaned closer to me and I tensed from the warmth she had.

 _"Thank you."_


	2. Where She Goes to a Gathering Again

**"My heart might be bruised, but it will recover and become capable of seeing beauty of life once more. It's happened before, it will happen again, I'm sure. When someone leaves, it's because someone else is about to arrive and I will find love again."**  
 ** _-Anonymous_**

* * *

 _Flashback_

 _I slept cozily in a pile of the loners that were Snowball's cats: the cats I joined and lived with for two moons now. I didn't know what to expect when I left the forest all those moons ago. The fact that I found these friendly cats that didn't even need to know your name to be nice to you was so much more than I expected._

 _Snowball was a fluffy white she-cat, one of the most kindest cats I met and was a lover of peace. Out of all the cats I interacted with here, I interacted with her the most. And I held onto a small hope that we could become mates someday._ Only _a small hope mind you. I didn't want another Redblossom situation on my paws. I cringed at the thought of those bitter memories and pushed them aside._

 _I let my eyes slight open to see Snowball sleeping beside me and I took in the peaceful cat's image and purred. At that moment, I was allowing myself to be happy._

 _What a terrible mistake that was._

 _The peaceful image of Snowball sleeping was violently ripped away from me when a group of rogues ran in here trapping us; one of them immediately leaping onto Snowball. I jumped and knocked the rogue off of Snowball with full force and growled. I wasn't going to lose my home, I_ _couldn't_ _lose my home._

 _But my desire to stay happy wasn't enough at the time._

 _Before my unsheathed claw could land on the rogue, the rogue turned around and sent a strong back kick with both legs that sent me flying till I hit the other_ _side of the den._ _I_ _felt_ _fear as I tried to get up but my paws barely_ _moved._

 _"SNOWBALL!"_

 _With that scream I heard left every last bit of hope that I had inside me. I didn't have to turn around to face the attack to know that our kind leader was dead. And with my luck, every member of our group would be dead too._

 _My heart was beating at a wild pace as the_ _screams_ _of my new_ _friends_ _stopped several_ _times_ _till there were no more screams. All that was_ _left_ _was the_ _cold_ _dead silence_ _for_ _several_ _long_ _moments_

 _Because I couldn't catch a break, a_ _rogue_ _grabbed my scruff and dragged me to the clearing outside of the den. I growled and the rogue that grabbed me leaped back._

 _"Crap! Cora, she's still alive!" The rogue hissed. I saw in the corner of my eye_ _the_ _cat that would eventually become my worst nightmare: a tall bright orange she-cat with a white spot on her forehead._

 _She looked at me and_ _I silently hoped that she would_ _let_ _me go or at the very_ _least_ _end_ _my suffering. Instead I saw a glint in_ _her_ _eyes and I feared_ _what_ _was going_ _to_ _happen_ _next._

 _"You're pretty." She finally said in an intimidating voice. "Take her back to the den and don't kill her just yet."_

 _My heart dropped as_ _two_ _rogues dragged me away back to the den_ _where I would wait until the leader of these vicious rogues would make_ _a_ _decision._

 _Several_ _sunrises later I was still recovering from the horrific attack, with the rogues giving me barely_ _enough_ _food and treatment to survive._ _But_ _they_ _made sure that I_ _stayed_ _weak_ _from_ _the attack so I wouldn't recover enough to gain the strength to try and escape._

 _I_ _was_ _facing the entrance of the den_ _when_ _the leader_ _of the_ _rogues_ _that_ _killed_ _all_ _of Snowball's cats_ _except_ _me_ _entered_ _the den. All of her rogues waited outside the den._

 _"I've made a final decision._ _This cat_ _that_ _I_ _believe_ _is_ _named_ _Blaze will become my newest prized mate." Cora announced._

 _"I'd rather you_ ** _kill me."_** _I spat._

 _All of Cora's rogues tensed and snarled, ready to leap at me and make my wish come true. But such sweet wishes would never come true for me as I saw Cora signal them to stay back._

 _"Now, now. She doesn't know what she's saying." Cora told the rogues before she looked back at me. "_ _You_ _have no idea what an honor it is to be_ _my_ _mate._ _I'm_ _the leader of over thirty rogues and we've killed more groups than we could count now. We're feared in every inch of this forest and soon we'll be leaving to attack Twolegplace next."_

 _"Killing innocent cats for no_ _reason_ _is_ _your_ _biggest accomplishment? Yep, you got me hun. I'm all yours."_ _I hissed sarcastically._

 _Cora looked like she was about to explode and before I could let_ _another_ _comment slip out of my mouth, Cora covered the distance between us_ _and_ _I saw her claw_ _reach_ _me_ _and_ _I_ _shrieked_ _. It wasn't_ _until_ _I_ _felt_ _blood roll onto my muzzle that I_ _realized_ _the_ _significance of_ _what_ _she did._

 _"If I hear another sarcastic comment you'll be saying goodbye to that ear entirely. " Cora announced, then her eyes lit up_ _when_ _she saw mine water_ _up_ _with_ _tears._ _"Please do weep. I_ _love_ _seeing_ _my mates realize the gravity of the situation they're in."_

 _When she said that I held back my tears and I looked at her defiantly._

 _"Fine, be that way. I'll break you eventually." Cora told me._

 _All the rogues left and Cora laid beside and wrapped her paws around me and nuzzled her face into my neck._

 _I've never felt more violated in my life._

* * *

 **Present day**

It had been three moons since I joined ThunderClan and I didn't have any friends here besides Hogtussle. Just cats that I made small talk with. Tonight was the Gathering and the last three times I didn't go given how awkward it'd be to see RiverClan again. Hogtussle loved the Gatherings and wanted me to go, she updated me on them constantly. And this time, I was considering going.

It was the moment Me and Hogtussle were sharing a rabbit leg when I decided to go. Of course Hogtussle's eyes were excitedly locked on mine when I put my paw over her eyes.

"You can quit the big eyes Hog, I'm going to the Gathering." I assured Hogtussle. She excitedly nuzzled me and skipped to our leader's den and came back moments later skipping even more eagerly and I knew that I was going to the Gathering. After we finished eating and the moon started rising, Waspstar came out of her den.

"Yellowlight, Hailflower, Leaffoot, Curlfoot, Harry, Adrien, Marinette, Lynxmask, Newtspots, Hogtussle, and Blazespirit will be going to the Gathering." Waspstar announced.

Both of Hogtussle's ex-mates were going, that'll make my first Gathering since I joined ThunderClan fun. I gave a sigh of annoyance as I walked beside Hogtussle to the island.

"You alright Blazespirit?" Hogtussle asked.

"With seeing RiverClan again and your ex-mates coming with, I'm worried that this Gathering is going to be a disaster for me." I admitted.

"Why would _my_ former mates be a problem for you?" Hogtussle asked.

"Cause you're my best friend Hogtussle. If they do or say something and you get upset, then that'll ruin my Gathering too." I explained.

"That's sweet Blazespirit, but I can handle them on my own." Hogtussle reassured me.

I noticed the reeds near the island and briefly remembered my time with RiverClan before I climbed onto the tree-bridge with Hogtussle behind me to make sure I didn't fall into the water.

When I landed on the island, I noticed that ShadowClan and RiverClan were already here and I caught Oakbranch's scent almost right away and I looked to my right and I saw Oakbranch and his mate Owlmask. When my fur tensed I came to the realization that I wasn't as ready as I thought I was.

 _"Blaze?"_ Oakbranch whispered.

"It's Blazespirit now." My ears flattened as stress from past memories began to intensify. "I've got to go."

"Wait, how are you? Are you happy?" Oakbranch asked.

"If happy means leaving my bad past only to join a bunch of loners that all get killed by a group of rogues lead by their leader who took me as her mate while I was injured, did unspeakable things to me, then threw me out like a rotten carcass...then sure! I'm happy." I snapped.

Oakbranch and Owlmask looked past me and I looked over my shoulder to see Hogtussle staring at me with shock. I felt fear and I ran out of the clearing and into the trees. I didn't want to be left alone, and it seemed that Hogtussle knew that because she followed me.

"Blazespirit...I had no _idea_ that all that stuff happened to you. With my problems such as past relationships and mean cats...I was dealing with demons and you were dealing with monsters." Hogtussle whispered, leaning against me. "You could've told me all those things and I'd stay by your side. You don't have to be alone in this, _I'm_ _here for you."_

I looked into her beautiful green eyes and felt incredibly happy that she understood the pain and the suffocating that I felt moons ago and I leaned into her shoulder. I knew moons ago that I was over Redblossom, my feelings for Snowball were also a lost cause and she was probably just a crush, and I was never in love with Cora to begin with, so I certainly didn't miss her anymore. When my head was close to hers, I felt her intoxicating scent that I smelled from the day I met her mess with my thinking. Did I want to _be with_ my best friend? Forever I don't know...but tonight I _certainly do._

After I expressed my gratitude to her, we spent the rest of the Gathering laughing and leaning against each other basking in each other's presence and I thought that I saw Waspstar looking at us with a glint of happiness in her eyes. Was her mother approving me as her daughter's lover or something? I didn't concern myself with it too long because after the Gathering was over, we walked to an area many fox-lengths away from ThunderClan.

When she put her paw on my chest, that's when the worries and questions sprang to life. Hogtussle had many failed relationships and the only other time that I mated with another cat was the evil leader named Cora. What would her ex-mates think? What if fate would intervene with my happiness and hurt Hogtussle like it hurt Snowball? I moved back a little and Hogtussle removed her paw from my chest.

"I won't do anything you don't want me to do Blaze." Hogtussle reassured me. "I like you a lot, but just know that whatever you want is fine. If you want to do it once, several times, or not at all. That's fine with me."

I almost felt like crying because she was giving me the right that was violently revoked from me moons ago: _consent._ And I believed that I was ready, but what did this mean for us? How would ThunderClan react if they somehow found out? I pushed down the storm of questions swarming over my mind and for the first time in a very long time, I allowed myself to give in to happiness and desire.

"I'm ready." I whispered as I leaned into Hogtussle and her lovely scent, her bubbly voice, her safe presence.

 _Her perfect everything._

 **Cora's POV**

"How's Mina doing?" I asked one of my pathetic rogues about the black and brown she-cat that became my mate after that pathetic Blaze moons ago. I didn't remember the rogue's name and I didn't care. What mattered was that the one mate that actually enjoyed being my mate would recover from her greencough. The grey unnamed tabby shrank back and I growled.

 _"Don't lie to me."_ I spat.

"She's not...she's dying. We don't think she's going to make it through the night-"

 ** _"Move."_** I snarled, shoving the tom aside and entering the den where Mina was by her lonesome. I leaned into her sick fur and felt anger, rage, and another feeling that I would never show to any other cat till the day I die: sadness. It was a feeling that I let loose when my father killed my mother, and it was a feeling that I would never show again.

"I'm s-sorry Cora. You mean a lot to me but I feel like I'm s-s-slipping away..." Mina whimpered. I let my tail rest on her back and I whispered comforting words, and since fate hated me, I would lose the only cat that wanted me back. Mina stopped breathing completely and I ran out of her den and all my rogues looked at me fearfully. Every time a mate of mine died or managed to escape, I usually threw a rageful fit and ripped the ears of some of my rogues. But I let Blaze go, and due to her constant talk of the Clans when I wasn't around, I knew where she went.

"Attention my rogues, Mina is dead. Our mission is to find and bring Blaze back to become my mate again." I announced. "Branden and Elijah will be watching the queens and the kits till we get back. We leave now."

My rogues wasted no time following me out of our temporary camp and that's what truly satisfied me: knowing that many cats were at my beck and call, that I could get any cat I want as my mate, that I could conquer any territory I wanted.

Blaze was as good as **_mine_.**


	3. Where She Thinks it's Love

**_"Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for."_**  
 **-Bob Marley**

* * *

 _Flashback_

 _It felt_ _like_ _I_ _was in a_ _foreign_ _world completely different_ _from_ _the Clans I was raised around_ _._ _Instead_ _of the friendship, love, and cooperation_ _that_ _RiverClan had_ _with_ _their warriors,_ _I_ _was in a depressing and hopeless_ _place_ _full_ _of_ _murderous strangers that hate me. Not one_ _cat_ _was here to ask if_ _I_ _was OK, or_ _was_ _even there to give me emotional support._ _There_ _would be no one_ _but_ _myself_ _to_ _save me._

 _Sometimes_ _I_ _felt sadness and pain tearing me apart, and other times_ _I_ _didn't_ _feel_ _anything_ _at all. I didn't_ _remember_ _the names of_ _these_ _strangers_ _and_ _I_ _didn't_ _care to._ _They_ _didn't care to remember my_ _name_ _either,_ _they_ _just_ _knew_ _that_ _I_ _was_ _Cora's_ _mate and_ _they_ _hated it._ _For_ _some reason beyond my understanding, they_ _were_ _jealous_ _of me. Most_ _of_ _the_ _rogues_ _wanted to be Cora's mate._

 _Over the next_ _few_ _moons, my mind manipulated the situation_ _so_ _it seemed more positive that_ _it_ _actually was. I_ _didn't_ _feel nearly as upset when Cora held me because a part of me gave up hope_ _that_ _any of_ _this_ _would change._

 _When_ _she_ _mated with me,_ _that_ _was a_ _different_ _story. No_ _matter_ _how many times she_ _did_ _it_ _I_ _felt used, embarrassed, and ashamed._

 _I was in our_ _den_ _waiting_ _for her_ _to_ _come back. That's how_ _she_ _wanted it to be after all:_ _m_ _e laying_ _on_ _the ground obediently waiting for her_ _to_ _decide what to do_ _with_ _me next._

 _"Yes...she would make a great mate!"_

 _What? My heart stopped_ _when_ _I_ _heard Cora's voice outside, talking about someone else._

 _"_ _She's_ _quiet_ and _obedient!" Cora purred. "Unlike_ _that_ _stubborn_ _rat_ _that_ _I've had_ _to_ _put_ _up with for seven moons._ _Hell_ _, even Connor wasn't as incompetent as her. Rogues! Get_ _Blaze_ _out of my_ _den_ _and in front of me!"_

 _What? Was_ _I_ _that horrible of a mate? I didn't have_ _time_ _to ask as_ _I_ _felt_ _two_ _rogues_ _sink their_ _teeth_ _into_ _the_ _fur_ _around_ _my shoulders and began_ _to_ _drag me_ _out_ _of_ _the_ _den that_ _I_ _was_ _held_ _captive_ _in_ _and_ _dumped_ _me_ _in_ _front_ _of the cat who forced_ _the_ _title of_ _lover_ _upon me_ _. There was no_ _love_ _in_ _her_ _eyes, only hate and resentment._

 ** _As usual._**

 _I saw the plump black and brown she-cat look at Cora with a content and ditzy gaze, blissfully_ _unaware_ _of how_ _evil_ _the_ _cats around her were._ _She'll_ _soon see how awful this place really is._

 _"Get out." Cora_ _snarled_ _looking_ _down_ _at me. Those two words were so surreal, why_ _didn't_ _she kill me or torture me some more_ _?_

 _"...w-what?" I_ _stammered_ _as_ _I_ _felt my world changing all over again. "You're letting me go?"_

 _"After all the incompetence I've had to put up with, do you really think I'd give you the pleasure of_ _killing_ _you?"_ _Cora_ _growled. "You deserve_ _to_ _suffer_ _and_ _live_ _your_ _life as the cat you truly are."_

 _I_ _felt_ _so_ _many_ _feelings at once,_ _and_ _I_ _bolted out of_ _the_ _forest. It wasn't until a good_ _amount_ _of_ _distance_ _was put between me and Cora that_ _I_ _finally let the tears fly. My future_ _couldn't_ _be_ _more uncertain._

 **Present day**

A quarter-moon had passed since the first time me and Hogtussle hooked up, and we had hooked up numerous times since then. In fact we were coming back to camp from _one_ of those times.

It made me feel happy that as we were heading back to camp, we talked on and on about Clan gossip. Which had become a tradition that I looked forward to each time we went back to camp. The rumors and gossip were also helpful to tell other ThunderClan cats so they would think of those rumors instead of the possibility that me and Hogtussle could be more than friends. After all, we had kept our hookups a secret from ThunderClan for several reasons.

The main reasons were because of Hogtussle's past relationships and a rumor that was going around that Newtspots was indeed still in love with Hogtussle and that Amy _is_ a rebound. It would be really disastrous if both those things were true, and if our relationship was out in the open...it would be a wreck.

Wait, _relationship?_

I didn't m-mean romantic or anything like that. But the only cat that I'm sure knows about me and Hogtussle is her mother and probably her silly Dad Hailflower. And since they were literally the best parents I've met, it was no problem at all.

Me and Hogtussle flinched when Newtspots came into view moments before we were about to go into camp.

"Where _were_ you two?" The scrawny and nosy tom asked, his eyes narrowed.

"Looking for prey, no such luck." I pulled out the first excuse I memorized. Newtspots didn't believe me, I could tell from the annoyed looked in his eyes.

"Does it even _matter?"_ Hogtussle stepped towards her ex-mate. Newtspots looked angry for a few moments before he gave a smug grin.

"So if it doesn't matter, you don't mind if I go around telling ThunderClan that I saw you two coming back to camp together?" Newtspots looked triumphant until Hogtussle put her claws in Newtspots's paw, making him pull back and wince in pain.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're _jealous._ You wouldn't want me telling Amy that would you?" Hogtussle growled.

"She wouldn't believe you." Newtspots looked afraid and I became overwhelmed by Hogtussle's strong nature, I found myself _liking_ her unwavering self. Somehow it made _me_ feel more confident.

"Well if you open your big mouth about us then she'll certainly be suspicious. I mean, why _would_ you care about what we're doing so much?" I added. I saw Hogtussle look at me from the corner of her gaze and her lips curved into a smile before she looked back at Newtspots.

"W-whatever." Newtspots growled. "I love Amy after all, not Hogtussle. So there's no reason for me to say anything about you two."

Newtspots turned around and left back to camp. As soon as he left, Hogtussle turned around and pressed her face into my shoulder. And she was... _giggling?_

"He's _so_ in denial!" Hogtussle laughed. "It's just so sad that Amy hasn't seen it yet."

"Seen what?"

"That he's still in love with me!" Hogtussle exclaimed, amusement still in her eyes till she looked at me. "W-wait, what's wrong Blazie?"

"Do you still love him?" I blurted out, holding back the anger that was starting to build up. Why did I have to be so bitter? Shouldn't I just let her want who she wants?

 _Perhaps you don't want her and you to stop...perhaps..._

 ** _You're in love_**

"Of course not! He's such a badger-hearted crazeball!" Hogtussle rolled her eyes, before she jokingly nudged me. "Why? You jealous?"

"Yes." I have to stop blurting out these things.

Hogtussle's humored gaze disappeared again to be replaced by a look of seriousness that made me nervous. Probably even more nervous than usual because Hogtussle was almost never serious.

"Do _you_ love me?" Hogtussle asked genuinely.

"I don't know how to answer that." I was suddenly determined to hide my feelings that I didn't know I had till this moment. "I m-mean it doesn't matter, all we're doing is mating."

 _"'All we're doing?'_ Mating is really special Blazespirit, that's why I do it with you. You're my best friend and I really like you." Hogtussle admitted. "I...I think I'm just going to go-"

 _"Don't._ I'm sorry, I'm just afraid of my feelings. All that my feelings have done my whole life is brought me into horrible situations." I cried. "If I follow my heart again, what will happen to you? You could leave me or _get killed._ I'm sorry Hogtussle, but you don't deserve me as a best friend, let alone as your mate. You deserve to be happy _and_ safe."

I ran back to camp with a whole new kind of sadness. I thought of the sadness that I felt from unrequited feelings, abuse, and so much more. But to have to turn away from someone who truly loves you for you...to me that felt like the worst kind of sadness. Especially since this was all my fault.

Is ThunderClan not my home either? What if I don't belong anywhere, _how is that even possible?_

I didn't think it could worse from here, but it did.

When I finally entered ThunderClan camp, Waspstar and most of her warriors were facing a group of cats that looked familiar. However, it was their leader that was impossible for me to not remember...

 ** _Cora_**

 _"No..."_ I whispered. I'm not certain about where I belong, but I was certain that it wasn't with that terrifying, psycho, manipulative she-demon. I was about to run away when her cold and sharp eyes met mine.

 ** _"You."_** Cora growled. "I'm here to take back what's mine, _now come here."_

"W-w-w-what about Mina?" I stuttered, desperately hoping that she'd stay where she was across the camp.

"She died and I'm in need of a mate again." Cora explained. "So you-"

"But I thought I was incompetent and stubborn, why don't you take one of your rogues as your mate?" _Leave me alone please._

"Because you are a gorgeous prize, and a frisky little she-cat when it came to mating too." Cora grinned and her tail flicked excitedly. "You just have to be a little more laid-back, and then you'd be the _perfect mate._ I'll be a little softer on you if you just come with me willingly this time...so will you?"

 _"She doesn't have to do anything for you!"_

No, _stay away from Cora!_

Hogtussle appeared and she stood before Cora and all her rogues with no fear, which scared me even more. Cora looked furious that my best friend would even talk to her in that tone.

"And who might _you_ be?" Cora growled.

 ** _"I'm her mate!"_**

What?! _No!_ She's going to _get killed!_

I shrieked and covered my eyes when I saw Cora's claw reach swiftly towards Hogtussle...but I didn't hear anything. I lifted a paw from my eyes and saw that Hogtussle leaped back from Cora and didn't look intimidated. Cora sharply moved her tail left and right, and with that signal all her rogues ran towards Hogtussle. But the ThunderClan warriors were quicker to build a wall around her and me, fighting them off with their claws and teeth. It wasn't until most of Cora's rogues were beaten and panting that she decided that her and her rogues were outnumbered.

"Rogues! Back to me!" Cora shouted with her commanding voice, and when they were all behind her again bathed in their own blood, she turned to me again. "This isn't over, you won't have this group of cats to protect you forever. They'll realize how _worthless_ you really are and that protecting you isn't worth all their deaths. Or they'll all die from trying to protect you from me. _Either way I'll get what I want sweetie._ And that's your body, **_and nothing more."_**

Cora gave a casual flick of her tail and walked out of camp, with all of her rogues following. Waspstar looked shocked, and possibly scared. If she was it was hard to tell.

"Every cat that can catch their own prey, come forward immediately. Any of the cats that are severely injured please go into the medicine cat's den, did anyone die?" Waspstar asked, looking over the battlefield. She gave a sigh of relief after she finished looking. "Thank StarClan that battle ended as quickly as it did, but they will attack again. So I will go to every Clan with two cats by my side to ask for their assistance to chase off these rogues for good. The warrior code states that the Clans must unite to make sure no one Clan falls so they'll have to help or they'd be breaking the code. Leaffoot and Lynxmask will go with me and Hawkspiral will be in charge till I come back. Any questions?"

"I have one, is what happens to the Clan not more important than the fate of one simple cat?" Newtspots asked.

"What are you trying to say?" Waspstar narrowed her eyes.

"I'm saying that all we have to do is give Blazespirit over to those rogues and they'll leave us alone!" Newtspots looked proud at his suggestion and my heart stopped. I didn't want to go back to her, but what if it was for the good for this Clan that's given so much to me?

"We will _never_ do that, we are _not_ monsters." Waspstar lashed her tail angrily. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're trying to get my daughter's mate out of our Clan so you can have her all to yourself."

"What did she say?!" I heard Amy screech from the Nursery. I never wanted this, I never wanted to get into more love drama, or put an entire Clan in danger. But isn't this kind of stuff what usually happens?

 _After all, I made the mistake of falling in love with my best friend_

 ** _Who knows what kind of suffering would be in store for me next_**


	4. Where She Fights for Happiness Part 1

**_~Blazespirit~_**

 _Life was so much simpler back in the Tribe_

 _When I didn't have to fret over the lives of others,_ _or_ _had to push down so_ _many_ _feelings_ _of_ _pain_ _or_ _desire_

 _When I_ _didn't_ _fear what each sunrise would bring_

 ** _And_ _now_ _a war was storming in_**

* * *

Two sunrises passed and Waspstar had organized an emergency Gathering consisting of all the leaders, deputies, and senior warriors of each Clan. Even though I'm not a senior warrior, Waspstar insisted that I go since I know the most information about Cora. But I never wanted this to happen to begin with.

I didn't know if I wanted Hogtussle to come or not, but she chose not too. She probably thought that I was still upset about our conversation, but I was too afraid. The Clans were threatened because of _me._

I know I should've just turned myself in, but I know how Cora is. Call me a coward, but I never want to be her tortured victim. _Never again._

Onesplash, Leaffoot, Curlfoot, and Quickmouse were the senior warriors with us as well as Hailflower who Waspstar told _not_ to make jokes at this serious Gathering. As much as I love the humorous tom, one of his biggest flaws was making jokes at inappropriate times.

And then I remembered that _RiverClan_ would be there, adding on to the sickness in my stomach as I climbed the tree-bridge. Once I entered the island I saw Icestar's upset gaze and Stonestar's cold gaze that showed no fear. I saw Applefrost, Sedgestep, Snailstep, Voletooth, Oakbranch, Ivyheart, and... ** _Redblossom?_**

What were her and Ivyheart doing here, don't they both have kits in the Nursery? I looked at Redblossom as she talked to her father calmly and was surprised to feel no pain or sadness. Was I _really_ over her or was I too stressed out to care?

I saw WindClan's senior warriors waiting with the most stone-still faces I've ever seen and a lanky, young, black and white tom. His figure was so thin that I thought the wind would blow him away.

If you didn't already notice, the Clans brought some non-senior warriors because of their dedication and skill. I could obviously see Voletooth being brought here because of her fierceness and her fighting skill, or Oakbranch because of his will to sacrifice his life for others. I would know, he lost his eye because of me.

But what about that skinny tom?

"That's Jetbreeze, he's Blossomheart's son." Waspstar explained after she noticed me looking at him. "He's not a skilled fighter, but he's very strategic. His plans to chase off ShadowClan's invasions work almost every time."

"Wait...where is ShadowClan? From what I've heard about their hate for the rest of the Clans, I don't think they'll want to help us." I pointed out.

Waspstar didn't respond as she looked away. However I heard other warriors talking about the same thing.

"Should we just start the Gathering without them?" Icestar's deputy Fortune suggested.

"I don't have a good feeling about this." Ivyheart told her mate nervously. Stonestar whispered something in her ear but she didn't look relieved.

"They did say they were coming." Leaffoot said to our leader. "Maybe they're just not interested in helping?"

"Maybe, either way we have to take care of this problem _now."_ Waspstar decided before taking her place on one of the lower branches of the oak tree. Stonestar and Icestar eventually gave up on ShadowClan coming and also took their places on their own branches.

"We have been brought here to address the rogues that attacked ThunderClan." Icestar announced. "They will not stop so we must come together to chase them out."

I knew if they were only chased away, they would come back. Cora almost never had to deal with a challenge, and if my capture became one, she would kill over and over again until I was back in her vicious claws.

The three leaders continued discussing how and where they'd begin the attack on the rogues given we don't know where they are at. The Gathering was interrupted by the sound of several frantic paws.

A smaller white she-cat and a brown and white tom fell off the tree-bridge clumsily and scrambled to their paws.

" _The rogues...ShadowClan...t-they-"_

"Duckpaw! This is an emergency!" His sister snapped before returning to her frantic state. "The rogues and ShadowClan have joined together to attack the Clans, and they've started with us!"

Stonestar lost his composure and he ran past all of us and onto the tree-bridge, all of his warriors following just as fast, aware that their loved ones back in RiverClan were in great danger.

"We need to fight them off, all of us might be enough to keep RiverClan from perishing." Icestar decided.

"Don't worry Blazespirit, you can go back to camp and-"

"I will go." I assured Waspstar. "RiverClan was the Clan that raised me, and it's warrior code to protect the other Clans."

Waspstar's gaze softened and I could tell that she was proud of me. I spared little time to run to the tree-bridge and towards RiverClan territory.

When I entered camp, I tripped on something warm and soft. But when I got up, I realized _that it was a dead body._

It was Shallowstar and Ivyheart's daughter Berryshine! Oh no...he _wouldn't-_

"How does it feel to see cats from your home Clan die?" I saw the bushy ShadowClan leader walk towards me as if there wasn't a chaotic battle happening.

"You _killed_ your firstborn daughter." I growled. "You tossed your mate away like you two had _nothing._ I heard that you used to care about your family, what brought you to _this?"_

 _"_ _That_ _fox-heart mated_ _with_ _another_ _tom!"_ Shallowstar yowled in misery about Ivyheart. "And she acted like nothing happened! Breezespirit told me everything and she comforted me, letting me know that there were still cats who cared."

"Is _that_ what this is about?" I heard Ivyheart speak in disbelief. _"Shallowstar,_ why would you believe a word that manipulative she-cat says? You should've asked me first before pushing down your feelings instead of making everyone else suffer."

"I don't believe you! Even if I did, that doesn't change the fact that our love was dying before your eyes and you didn't do anything to stop it!" Shallowstar cried.

"For StarClan's sake, I never wanted to stop loving you before I left." Ivyheart confessed. "But your fears and doubt has turned you into a monster! Look at what's happening right now, is _this_ what you've wanted?"

"I..." Shallowstar's eyes widened and his ears flattened as if he was finally considering that this was all a mistake made out of his insecurities. _"ShadowClan, stop!"_

The group of fierce warriors stopped fighting with the rogues and looked at their leader.

 _"Shallowstar,_ what do you think you're doing?" I saw Cora exit the warrior's den, dropping a dead body as she glared at the tom.

"ShadowClan, all of our attacks since Ivyheart's departure have been for n-nothing. I let innocent cats die because I couldn't handle losing Ivyheart." Shallowstar admitted shamefully to his whole Clan. "I've let you all down."

 _"_ _You've_ let me down too! I thought we agreed on attacking RiverClan and ThunderClan together but it looks like you've gone _soft."_ Cora snarled. "Love drives you mad hmm? Well you have _no_ _idea_ what happened to me throughout my life! At least you _had_ someone that loved you!"

Cora ran at the heartbroken tom and turned around at the last second to send a vicious back kick into Shallowstar's ribs, causing him to collapse in a heap of motionless fur and moan in pain. Cora wasted no time to leap at the fatally wounded tom and sank her teeth into his neck while her rogues kept us from stopping her.

Ivyheart was in tears from losing her oldest kit, and even though Shallowstar's death wouldn't shatter her world, she looked upset that everything played out the way it did. And I don't blame her, none of this should've happened. The ShadowClan warriors looked conflicted with no idea on who they should follow with no leader. Most of them ran away, but some of them remained with the rogues.

"ThunderClan is _next,_ unless you are selfless enough to give yourself up to me." Cora let her eyes gloss over each cat's face, many of them were shocked and internally begging me to end this.

"I...I..."

"Oh for StarClan's sake, you're not more important than all of the Clans-"

 _"You shut up!"_ Waspstar snarled over the random warrior. "What kind of leader would I be to toss this warrior to murderers? I would be no better than the murderers! Is it really selfish for one cat to _not_ want to be tortured? Maybe we're selfish, because we can't even bother to understand all that she's gone through. And are we not willing to try hard enough to fight rogues like we've been our whole Clan lives?"

"Ugh, you almost just talked me to death!" Cora spat. "Whatever! My rogues will be back stronger than ever, and Blaze _will_ _be_ _mine!"_

Cora angrily stormed off with her group of cats following her with several new members.

"I suspect that she might be doing an attack right now. All of my warriors return to camp except Blazespirit...yes, you too Hailflower." Waspstar nuzzled her affectionate mate and he lead the senior warriors back in an enthusiastic trot. As if no bloody and devastating battle happened.

Then I saw Redblossom, Flyfur, Voletooth, Songpool, Brownpelt, Oakbranch, and Owlmask hovering over something, their bodies shaking with deep sobs. I slowly padded over and held back a gasp as I recognized the dead body they stood over.

 ** _Spidermoon._**

" _Oh...n-no."_ I whispered in horror. "She was my mentor...and Oakbranch's mother...and your friend...and _your_ mate."

"She was one of the most excitable cats in RiverClan. She was so happy, bright, and _beautiful..."_ Brownpelt whimpered.

"I'll get Blossomheart." Owlmask told her grieving mate before running toward the moor. Voletooth reluctantly dragged a gray and white tom to a building pile of bodies.

" _Not m-my son! Pigeonwing!"_ Songpool ran to her dead son and two more cats comforted her. I recognized some of the dead cats on the dirt such as Applefrost, Honeybreeze, Misha, and Toadsnarl. Even though all the kits in the Nursery seemed to be safe, the Elder's den didn't look crowded anymore. Mothleap was the only cat still alive and she was grieving over her dead mate.

I was _furious,_ how could Cora do this?!

"I have a plan, but it'll only work if we have enough cats willing to help." Waspstar announced. "We'll need cats from the other Clans to stay with us until the rogues attack, and when they do, warriors will go out to bring the rest of RiverClan and WindClan to fight with us."

"I'll go, they need to _suffer_ for killing Spidermoon." Brownpelt growled.

At first, a lot of RiverClan cats were reluctant to say anything since they didn't want to leave to stay in ThunderClan for a few sunrises after the devastating battle. But I saw the two young cats from earlier jump forward along with a young black tom.

"We want to come with!" The brown and white tom Duckpaw spoke. Oakbranch's eye widened and he ran to their side.

"You three need to stay here, didn't you see what happened back there? I don't want my own kits getting killed." Oakbranch tried to plead with his kits. Owlmask gently rested her tail on her mate's shoulder.

"Oakbranch, what kind of warriors would they be if they cowered at the idea of battle?" Owlmask told him. "I think this could be a wonderful final assessment for them too. Remember when you always wanted to protect me from battle?"

"...yeah. But this is different! Aren't you slightly worried about what could happen to our own kits?" Oakbranch's voice shook.

"I love our kits with all my heart and I trust StarClan to watch over them no matter what." Owlmask told her mate firmly. "Your father and the other ThunderClan warrior will make sure that they are prepared to fight."

Oakbranch's shoulders slouched and he gave a sigh of defeat. He had to understand that the cats he loved dearly would constantly be facing danger. It was the entire purpose of being a warrior!

"Does anyone else want to stay with us?" Waspstar asked. No one responded and she thanked RiverClan for their support before she lead me, Brownpelt, and Oakbranch's kits to WindClan where we would ask if any cats would stay with us.

WindClan was surprisingly generous and let us borrow eight of their warriors, including two of Blossomheart's kits.

These warriors wouldn't stay with us long, but at least when Cora tried to attack ThunderClan with her fierce rogues, we'd be strong enough to handle them until more help arrived.

 ** _Maybe then all of this will be behind me and_ _I_ _can be happy_**


	5. Where She Fights for Happiness Part 2

**_~Blazespirit~_**

 _I may not leave a_ _mark_ _in_ _the history of the_ _Clans_ _like Redblossom did_

 _But_ _I_ _will_ _find_ _love and happiness_

 _I will fight with all my strength to get my happy ending_

 ** _I'm done with suffering, this ends now_**

* * *

It has been a half-moon since we brought several RiverClan and WindClan warriors to stay with us, and the extra amount of warriors was starting to become noticeable. We had several more mouths to feed, but once we defeated Cora and her rogues, it'd be worth it. We had four cats watching the borders at all times. A quarter-moon ago, Waspstar apprenticed Flamepaw to Fernleap and Ashpaw to Mistbird even though they were a half-moon short of six moons. But that difference didn't matter when we needed all the help we could get.

And no, me and Hogtussle haven't talked. It wasn't completely because I was trying to avoid her, I've been helping Waspstar and Hawkspiral plan for when the rogues show up. It was for the best. After all I had to take care of the mess I brought to the Clans.

Various techniques were taught in the last half-moon that would hopefully end this. The Queens even built a wall of brambles and thorns with a mossy covering on the other side so the queens and kits could exit the Nursery safely. Amy had broken up with Newtspots for obvious reasons, but even he wasn't stupid enough to complain at this point.

After spending my life running from the Tribe to running from RiverClan to running from the rogues to running away from my feelings for my best friend, I _hated_ waiting any longer. I wanted the rogues to attack so we could pound them in the dust.

Another hunting patrol came back safely with ThunderClan's only apprentices proudly carrying fresh-kill when I heard one of the WindClan warriors cry out a warning before it was cut off.

 _They're_ _here._

They came in all at once, many of them with sharp scratches from the thorn barrier in front of our camp. Some of them blocked the entrance, but we knew that would happen.

 _"Apprentices!"_ Waspstar called. Flamepaw, Ashpaw, and Oakbranch's kits all leaped on to the rogues blocking the entrance, allowing two warriors to escape to get help.

There was something different about this battle too. The warrior code said that you could not kill unless it was absolutely necessary. And for these blind-sighted and bloodthirsty rogues, _it_ _was._

The rogues were surprised to see us willing to fight back in the same way they were. The battle was heated as bodies started hitting the ground and I had flashbacks of when they slaughtered Snowball and all of the kind cats that cared for me. All of them were gone and I let it happen.

I froze in horror as I looked at a dead gray body, only to realize that it was a rogue. _Not Hogtussle._ I couldn't let these rogues destroy everything that made me happy, _not again._

I leaped at one of the rogues and sent a powerful back kick into their chest, sending them flying. As more and more cats were dying, I saw our victory swarming in before us: RiverClan and WindClan had arrived. Well, at least a few of RiverClan's warriors.

Cora's rogues began retreating in horror, realizing that the battle was lost before it even ended. Cora had killed one of our warriors when she noticed that the small remainder of her rogues had ran off.

 _"No!_ Where do you think you incompetent fox-brains are going?!" Cora spat. Then I saw the anger in her eyes disappear to be replaced by fear, her breathing turned into hyperventilating. She suddenly looked like a frightened kit.

"W-what?! One of you going to kill me?" Cora backed into a corner as she looked at all of us. "Well go ahead! You vicious Clans clearly outnumbered my rogues, and now you're going to kill me! Q-quit staring at m-m-me and _just do it!"_

"Wait." I flicked my tail as I approached the cat that had tortured me for moons. "I can't let this happen."

"Why? Want to revoke the little dignity I have left and refuse me the pleasure of being killed like I did to you?" Cora hissed. "Going to keep me trapped here where my failures can sink in?"

"No, I want you to join ThunderClan."

 _"What?!"_ Hogtussle covered her paw after her outburst and her parents looked at each other in shock.

"What you've done to me was awful, but I forgive you. I can't let what you did define me and upset me any longer." I decided. "All I've wanted was to be happy, and every cat deserves that right. So what do you say?"

"...I say that you can take your pathetic offer and stick it back into your pathetic and merciful mind _where it belongs!"_ Cora snarled. She got up. "You're clearly too soft to kill your enemy when she deserves it. Looks like I have to do everything myself!"

Cora ran past all of us and I shoved past the other warriors, following her. I saw her run straight for the lake and she leaped into the water. I ran all the way to the edge of the lake when I felt another cat sink their teeth into my tail to keep me from jumping in. I looked at Cora before she completely disappeared into the depths of the water to find a _sadness and loneliness_ in her eyes that looked all too familiar. I felt my heart slightly drop knowing that Cora had died feeling like the lowest and emptiest cat to walk the Earth.

 _She chose to walk this path, but I wished that she didn't spend her life destroying, killing, and terrifying every cat she met._

I felt the cat's grip on my tail disappear and I turned around to see that it was my best friend Hogtussle, the cat I've grown to love and want to spend the rest of my life with.

"I couldn't let you get killed trying to save a cat that didn't want to be saved." Hogtussle admitted. "There will _always_ be dangers, we're warriors. But maybe I'm just not worth the pain, so I'm sorry for getting my life tangled up with yours. I've done this too many times and we both need to get a grip on our lives. So...yeah."

I felt my heart tear apart and I put my paw on Hogtussle's shoulder before she thought about leaving.

"I guess we do need to get our lives together huh? I still have to get over everything that's happened and you still have to accept the ex-mates in our Clan, especially Newtspots." I agreed. "I don't want to give up on you though. I want to be your mate even though you could get hurt, I just need time. If you can't give me that, you don't have to stay."

"Of course I'll give you time." Hogtussle nuzzled my cheek briefly before she turned around to leave. "We should go back though, the Clans are probably getting restless!"

I blinked in amusement and I followed Hogtussle back into ThunderClan camp where Oakbranch and Owlmask were reunited with their kits. I hoped that Brownpelt would feel lifted from avenging his mate's death, but the dark brown tom still looked heartbroken. WindClan had already left with all of their warriors, but some of RiverClan still lingered. Including Redblossom.

"Hey Redblossom." I meowed. Redblossom's eyes lit up when she saw me and she approached me with a friendly look.

"Hey Blazespirit! I'm sorry about this whole battle, but at least it ended very quickly." Redblossom said. "I hope you're OK."

"I'm better than OK, in fact I'm really relieved. Maybe now StarClan will forgive me." My eyes widened when Redblossom starting laughing. "What's so funny?"

"You didn't do anything wrong! Your life has just been so hectic, staying fused with me and getting caught by rogues. But I don't think StarClan intended for you to hurt during any of it." Redblossom assured me. "You deserve seasons of peace and happiness, and you can always have Yellowlight put in a good word for you at the Moonpool if nothing changes."

We both laughed at her statement and Flyfur joined us, the tom resting his tail on his mate's shoulder. Even though we wouldn't be friends, I no longer felt resentment towards Flyfur. After all he wanted the exact thing I wanted at the time, the love of his life and the happiness they would share. RiverClan eventually left, and after a nice portion of fresh-kill, I finally allowed myself to enjoy the best sleep I've ever had.

Maybe I'll never completely heal from everything that's happened, but at least it'll make me stronger.

 **Seven moons later**

"Amberlight! Ivyflower! Hollymist! Moonheart!"

All of us chanted the warrior names of Redblossom's kits at the Gathering, including me and my mate Hogtussle. Our best friends Oakbranch, Owlmask, Spottedpelt, and Irisgaze were beside us. The former's kits became Dovestream, Duckskies, and Toadpelt after the battle with Cora's rogues.

Finchfrost became Finchstar and was bringing ShadowClan back to it's former glory. Most of the cats that used to follow Cora became warriors in all the Clans, including ThunderClan. One of them even became Amy's mate and the father figure of the kits she had with Newtspots, who was still accepting the fact that he was no longer with Hogtussle.

The Clans were making a great recovery from everything that happened, especially since various kittypets and rogues joined the Clans. And I didn't have to worry about suffering anymore, I got to fearlessly love Hogtussle for as long as fate would allow.

* * *

 ** _~Blazespirit~_**

 _It took a lot of strength, pain, and tears_

 _But I did it_

 _Not everyone gets their happy ending by sitting and waiting_

 _Nor does everyone get it right away_

 _You have to **work** for your dreams and happiness_

 _But believe me when I say in the end..._

 ** _It's worth every tear_**

* * *

 **The actual final(?) installment of the We Could Be Series is the upcoming midquel to We Could Be Heroes called _So There._ It is about the growing romance between Voletooth and Songpool and the first chapter will be published on _August 7th._**

 **Thanks for reading!**


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